Text: I Samuel 1:1-8 Title: #3 No More Mr. Fix It
Date: 6/2/13 Place: Aurora
Introduction: I love to fix things … or should I say I love to try and fix things. When things are broken, I REALLY enjoy jumping in and seeing if I can make things better. Our little home in Missouri was suffering from a leaky faucet. So I grabbed the old tools warned the family not to expect me for a few hours or so while I assessed the situation. Upon my first diagnostic look I confirmed what I had suspected … the faucet was leaky. However, wanting to leave no room for error I inspected further … off … leaking … on … leaking … off leaking … on leaking. Diagnostics were complete the verdict was in … leaky faucet.
My loving wife passed by a few times with some incredibly helpful and supportive suggestions … “Honey why don’t you wait for my dad to get here?” I turned around like, “have you seen this belt?” I announced my plan of action … “I am going to get the spout thingy off of the connector of the hose dealy. Then once inside I will determine the cause of the leak, repair it, reassemble the parts and enjoy a free flowing faucet.”
My dear, patient, ever supportive wife gently whispered … “At least turn the water off first?” So I wiggled under the sink, turned off the water and went to work on the faucet. When my son joined in he said, “That doesn’t look like the right tool daddy!” I turned and said, “Have you seen this belt?” I banged and hammered away until something POPPED and the nozzle was loose. A small victory, yes, but a victory none the less, and that was all I needed to convince me I was the man for the job. I dove into the disassembly project with all my might.
Soon, there where bits and pieces of sink laying all over the counter. Anyone else ever noticed taking things apart is a lot easier than putting them back together? So I scooped them up and started putting them back in place.
It was a work of art. Tools were flying, I was singing, my family was starring in terror and in a few short … hours I had every piece in its proper place. I called my dear loved ones in to witness my triumph. After a short speech I smiled did the drum roll and flipped on the leak free faucet! I was smiling like a king at coronation until Sueanne said, “Honey, why is there no hot water?”
I love to try and fix things but the truth is I am really bad at it. I have no idea how to use these tools and I usually make things worse. That is not only true in the house repair world that is true in the fixing people kind of world too. The truth is I love to try and fix people. I see someone hurting I am tempted to grab the tool belt and jump in but usually I just make things worse. But I know I am not the only one who suffers from the “Mr. Fix it disease.”
Text v. 1-2: The story begins with a rich dude. How do I know he was rich? I know how expensive it is to have one wife this fella has two! V.3-5. Elkanah provided well for Peninnah and her kids, that was his duty but Hannah was his love. He gave EVERYTHING he had to her. Extra gifts, more jewelry, a few supplemental gifts under the tree at Christmas, the nicer car, the bigger house, Hannah had his heart and everyone knew it, including the other wife … V. 6-7. This went one YEAR after YEAR. Hannah saw her friends all have their first child, their second child, and her hated rival have several beyond. This wasn’t a short time hurt this was a long time wound. She aches to have a child. She was broken, so hurt, that she would not eat, all she could do was cry. Then Elkanah comes in and says, maybe the most dunderheaded statement in all the world, v. 8.
See, Elkanah is a fixer. He knows his girl is hurting and it causes him to hurt because he loves her so much. He wants nothing more than to see that hurt go away. It breaks his heart every tear that she cries and he strives with all his might to fix it. She wants a baby so he does the natural thing … he gives her food!? Crazy! You can’t solve a conception problem with a cheeseburger, it doesn’t work that way. But it doesn’t matter if it makes sense He loves her so much he is throwing everything he can at the situation in hopes that something can work.
Some of you have been there. You have a child who just doesn’t seem happy so you give extra grace, more free time, bigger allowance, offer more hugs, but no matter what you do nothing seems to help. Maybe it’s a wife, a husband, or a friend that is going through something that no matter how hard you try you cannot fix it. Even though it doesn’t make any sense you through everything you can at them to try and heal the hurt.
All of us have done this. All of us are fixers. The problem is we use up all our resources, emotional, hoping to make them happy. What happens when they aren’t? We cry out, “Don’t I mean more to you than ten sons?” Somehow, in the middle of trying to help the ones that we love so much something switches and it becomes all about me. When I go from helping someone to fixing them it stops being about them and becomes all about me.
It happens all the time in parenting. I catch myself parenting not because of what is best for my sons but because somehow it reflects better on me. Ever been there? For all of the fixers in the room listen closely … it’s not always about you! When you realize that people’s response to you is not a reflection of you it will set you free!
Maybe this only happens to Americans but at least here we often convince ourselves that we can complete other people. We believe the hype that there is a perfect “soul mate” out there for us. So when those we love find hurt and heartache we take that as a sign that we are failing. If that is you this morning I have a word from the Lord just for you … God says, “I want my job back!”
You cannot fix soul level brokenness with your skin level interactions. Meat is not enough to cover the hurt of a broken heart. Pretty soon it becomes all about me and not only are you unhappy I am unhappy because I think you are unhappy with me and in this whole broken cycle the only one who could truly fix the situation gets left out. My selfishness actually distracts you from going to the one who could fix your broken heart!
The Jerry Maguire lie … two half people do not make a whole relationship!
James 1:19 – Be quick to listen and slow to speak and slow to get angry.